Simon Cowell has 3 combination locks on each garbage can to conceal baby condoms

Apr 19 2012

Simon Cowell has 3 combination locks on each garbage can to conceal baby condoms

Some really bored jerk off was snooping around Simon’s house and for whatever reason came across his garbage cans. I do find it a BIT extensive to have 3 combination locks on each of your garbage cans.

So I sent my detectives out to break into those cans and they found a bin full of finger condoms,and pop star magazines. Which perfectly solidifies everything that Mrs. Sharon Osbourne said yesterday about her boss on this talk show:

Read the rest of this…

Apr 19 2012

Listen to Mel Gibson’s lovely words of wisdom

Mel………….Where’s your meds? You need your meds. You are unraveling in such a delightful way. What would this world be without the wonderful likes of the crazies we all see on Sunset Blvd. Screaming out profanities and using the bathroom in their pants. I witnessed a young woman just the other day in Coffee Bean, screaming that she was going to shit on the staffs babies faces. Mel let’s be honest you are one enter click away from a babeling freak bum. Thank God for your money, use it for some good, go buy some meth and even yourself out…

I give it a week until my dog is lifting his leg and urinating on your dirty body.

Apr 16 2012

The REAL Shah’s of Sunset…

In honor of last nights season finale of Shah’s of Sunset. Here you go.

GG throws the BEST dinner party anyone has EVER been to in their entire lives….

Enjoy.

Apr 13 2012

The Shins on how to survive Coachella

I will unfortunately not be attending this weekends festivities, but for all you animals who are please do some dying for me.

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Apr 13 2012

Randall and Jasmine… disaster date..

This is exactly what I think of when you mention the word “date” to me….

Apr 13 2012

Cameron takes her new boobies to the beach:)

I want a vacation.

Cam Cam is vacationing, relaxing and tanning her new fun bags with her family in Hawaii. Looking at her makes me realize that if I don’t get a boyfriend soon, I too will probably end up looking like a body builder:(

She needs some tough, strong hands to soften those tight new breasts of hers. Their is an expression butterface.. well what’s an expression for butter top half. I’d kill for those legs, and her ass is great, but the whole top half is reminding me of Mrs. Man. Thank God her and A-Rod are no more, because the Dr. strongly advises against any heavy lifting. It’s not everyday a woman get implants and turns out looking more masculine.. weird..